[…] BALANCING PIECES ARIN SOLANGE AT HOME THE SAMANTHA SHOW […]
So it’s time for me to make an announcement. One that I never thought I would be making. I’ve emotionally had to process this whole thing for some time.
Unfortunately, I have been duped, deceived…I just feel like I’ve been lied to. My SneakPeek test results were wrong. I put my trust into a company that was supposedly reliable and only to learn that after doing some research- I’m not the first to have this happen to them. I’ve learned that there are many like me.
This is slightly controversial and I want you to hear me out…
I will start by saying that I am so very grateful to be carrying a healthy baby. I am so lucky that I have been blessed with the ability to create another life.
So I’ll get to it! A few weeks ago we were doing a routine ultrasound. The tech asked if we wanted to know the sex of the baby. We said that we already had a blood test, we are having a baby boy, but a visual confirmation would be appreciated.
The entire time we were doing the anatomy scan I kept seeing her go over the area and then back. After what felt like forever, she said “I can’t say with 100% confirmation…but I’m sorry to tell you, I think that your blood test was incorrect.”
I was immediately in denial. I was crushed. I was devastated.
She must be wrong! She has to be wrong! It must’ve been the angle. Let’s scan again. I blurted out, this can’t be. The company said that they were 99.1% accurate with their tests. I did the test completely correct. I followed all the instructions to the T. My husband never even touched the box. He wasn’t even home when I took the test. There are no other males in my house that could’ve skewed the test. We had a gender reveal party, with all of our friends and family. We shot blue confetti into the sky for freaking sake. How is this possible?
The tech stated that we could do another scan but it wouldn’t be possible for a few weeks because of the holidays. I was then moved into an exam room to meet with the doctor. My husband left for work. I sat there numb and staring off into space. A nurse came in to take my blood pressure and asked if I was okay. The flood gates opened. I was sobbing uncontrollably. I kept apologizing to the nurse, because in the back of my mind I thought, what if she is currently struggling to get pregnant and here I am complaining about which one I got. She kept saying I didn’t need to be sorry. That my feelings were valid and understandable. She went on to tell me she had 2 girls and a little boy.
Shortly after I managed to somewhat compose myself the Doctor came in. It wasn’t my usual Doctor, it was one from his practice. I’d never met this one before. He saw my face and had heard about my breakdown. My guess is that this wasn’t his first rodeo, but also the bedside manner could’ve used some work. I was basically scolded for even using “one of those tests” and told how I never should’ve relied on such a thing. Ghee, thanks.
Next thing he did was ask me a question. One that I thought I had already made up my mind about. One that I thought I would never have to answer again. He said “so now that you know you’re having another girl, are we still planning to tie your tubes at your c section?”
Well crap, it’s been 5 mins. I don’t know. No freaking clue. Why would you ask me that? Who knows? Yes we’re done, but wait should we try again. Ahhhhhh! Now cue the additional tears. He then said I didn’t need to make up my mind at this present moment, but I needed to make up my mind soon. He proceeded to remind me about how this decision was definite and there was no turning back. I completed the rest of the routine questions and went to cry in my car. I called a local imaging center and asked for them to please make time to see me ASAP.
They were gracious enough to agree to see me the next morning. I went into their office still in denial. This baby could still be a boy, she did say she couldn’t with 100% certainty after all. I went into the room hoping for the best (the tech before was wrong), yet expecting the obvious. Sure enough, there on that 5 foot projection screen there it was. A beautiful healthy baby girl. She was perfect. I became flooded with emotions all over again. The tech consoled me and held my hand. She then began to tell me that she actually had 2 sisters. That her sisters were the most amazing people on earth. That she recently lost her husband and father to her young child and that without her two sisters she could not have gotten through it.
At this point, we were both crying. I had gotten up to just hug her. I wanted to hold her and make her tears go away. She apologized for sharing her story and that she didn’t mean to upset me. I apologized to her for being so wrapped up in a gender and not thinking of the blessing that was right in front of me. My poor husband was in the corner of the room not knowing who to pass the tissues to and who to console. I composed myself and walked to my car. My husband again left to return to his day at work. I just sat in my car.
All I could think about was I’ve been lied to about this baby. For over 3 months I thought I was having a baby boy. I had been bonding with this baby boy. I was talking to him, picking out names and creating fictional scenarios with my baby boy. I was picking out boy clothes and pinning baby boy nurseries on Pinterest. I felt like I was now mourning a baby that I never had while still carrying a very healthy baby.
The feelings were so confusing and frustrating. I just felt conned, lied to and mislead. It wasn’t fair that this company could do this to people. In researching more I learned that I was one of so many. The SneakPeek test was not what it claimed to be. I reached out to them and was initially offered to buy a new test at a holiday discounted price.
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME! F- NO!
Later, once I was able to compose myself I reached out again and was told that I must have fallen into the .09% and ultrasounds were only 80%. I immediately asked for a refund and was told I was not eligible for a refund until I was able to provide a birth certificate as proof. FINE. That will be on my to do list for sure.
Overall, I can say that I am still upset with the company, not with the gender of my baby. I am excited to be carrying a healthy baby and now in the process of picking out gender neutral names (just in case, jk but not). I still have not yet made the decision on whether or not I will be tying my tubes and closing up shop.
Our house will remain a girl gang, at least for now.
Sarah says
I just wanted to say I feel you. In the opposite way. I have two boys and when I found out I wouldn’t be getting my baby girl that I had dreamed of for as long as I could remember, I was devastated. Even though I have two healthy children and two relatively easy pregnancies. Even though I love my boys to the ends of the earth. I think it’s ok to feel this grief over the loss of a person who may not have existed to anyone else, but who we always expected to exist eventually. It’s a really rough feeling and I totally empathise with you. Enjoyed reading your post, and I hope you end up getting your refund!
V says
Omg! I thought something was weird with your Instagram post but it didn’t really hit me! This will be an amazing story to tell your new daughter! She already sounds like she’s full of surprises. Loved this!
Bethann wagner says
I can’t believe that happened to you I’m so glad you have a healthy baby on the way though! Ugh! That’s crazy! Xx, bethann.
Ellen says
Conspiracy theory as I sit here hoping my SneakPeek is wrong (they say our 2nd boy is on the way, we’re only planning on 2 kids, and I’m devastated at the thought of never having a daughter):
Part of me wonders if this company doesn’t even test the blood and just chooses boy or girl at random. 50% chance of refund per customer but they wouldn’t have to pay for lab staff or testing supplies/equipment.
kristen says
I am so sorry that you are going through this. Gender disappointment is a real thing and can hit hard. I hope to continue to spread awareness about SneakPeek and their false tests to help others before their heart breaks. I hope you soon find comfort in your decisions and in life. xoxo
Gabbu says
They didn’t dupe or deceive you. They clearly state the test isn’t 100% accurate, and clearly offer a full refund if they are wrong. It happens, and there is no reason to be so upset with this company just because you happened to fall into a small minority. It had to happen to someone, and it’s sucks it was you, but that’s not on the company.
kristen says
Wow, you took the time to read my blog post where I poured out my heart and you decided that this was the way to respond. You clearly lack compassion and empathy. How about you do some research on the company and see the massive amount of lawsuits brought against them for the lack of accuracy. Then why don’t you speak directly with someone who was effected by the inaccurate results and then decide if it matters that it’s a “small minority”. Just because something isn’t a mass casualty doesn’t mean that the effect is any less tragic on someone. Let the person that it is effecting decide the damage, not a bystander that clearly has no regard for the feelings of others.
Rebecca says
I did SneakPeek with Baby #2, who was predicted to be a boy and indeed was a boy. We just got our SneakPeek results for Baby #3, also predicted to be a boy. Here’s the thing: we did IVF and know that an XX embryo was transferred. Someone has some explaining to do… I’m going to get a second blood test done today.
Melissa says
What did it end up being and how close were your pregnancies
kristen says
I now have 4 beautiful girls, my last two are 11 months apart.
Rachel says
This makes me so sad and I totally feel your pain . I’m having child number 5 and I have 4 boys who I love to the ends of the earth and wouldn’t change . But I so desperately want a little girl . The Chinese gender thing has always been right for me lol and it predicted a girl and I had a reading last jan that said I would have a 5th and it would be a girl . I know all speculation . But you look for anything that gives hope . I’ve just done sneak peek it’s come back as a boy . Now I must admit I didn’t clean as much as I should from what I’m reading and my 3 year old was bothering me lol . I won’t know for 6 weeks now . But I defo get gender disappointment . But then I will love this child no matter what . But I do feel I will always be missing that daughter I crave for
Jenae says
What ended up happening? Did you have a boy? I just got a boy result and I was hoping for a girl, but I feel similarly, I’ll of course love this baby no matter what.
kristen says
No, I did not. I have four amazing little girls.
Rachel says
I haven’t had mine yet but scan said another boy
Amy says
“this can’t be. The company said that they were 99.1% accurate with their tests”
Why do you think it’s 99.1% and not 100%?
kristen says
There’s a reason why there were lawsuits against them and they have numerous complaints on BBB. They now will not allow you to purchase unless you “agree to terms” on their site. This agreement allows them to not be held responsible for any errors or misinformation given. I’ve had so many others reach out to me with the same experience. It is sad that this company is allowed to continue doing this. Check Reddit for other peoples stories as well.
Anna says
Reading this made me cry. For so many reasons. I have to ask did you tie your tubes? The reason I ended up here was because I was hoping to find something like this. Something that would tell me sneak peak was wrong. Because I’m done too, I can’t make another baby I just can’t. And I’ve just been told I’m having my FOURTH girl, so girl gang remains here too. I wanted it to be a boy so bad but I know it probably habit not (but maybe) . Either way I understand why you were so upset. It’s almost like letting go of a dream. I’ll never be a mommy to a son. I love my little girl gang though and they’ll be the best sisters there ever were💜💜💜💜
kristen says
I ended up getting pregnant again just 7 weeks postpartum, I know have 4 GIRLS :). During my 4th c section we did decide to actually remove my tubes. It was said to be ever more effective than just tying them and I was already split open on the table. I am so happy to hear that others have resonated with my story and just “get it”. I really felt like I was having to defend myself to so many who never understood, because they had never been in that position. Girl Gang it is 🙂 xoxo
Elisa says
I am literally broken in half right now after I received my results from my Sneak peek test. I have 3 sons and was hoping for a girl this time but my results says it’s a boy. I really want to feel like it’s a blessing but i am so disappointed and hurt. I have always wanted a daughter. I am now on Baby #4 and they are all boys. I’m currently 8 weeks and hoping for some different news by the time the ultrasound comes. I really just don’t know how to feel at this point.
kristen says
My heart goes out to you and I am so sorry you are experiencing these feelings. I know it can be such a point of frustration and grief. Gender disappointment is 100% real and your feelings are valid.
Julianne Vander Veen says
I too have 3 sons, threw up till 20 weeks with all three. This one has been different. Just nausea. I felt so deeply it was a girl. Snap came back boy. The flood of tears overwhelmed me. I have an ultrasound for gender confirmation at 14 weeks. I’m praying snap was wrong. Between 3 little boys, a husband and a cat that’s a boy…I’m hoping I wasn’t as careful as I thought lol. I get the disappointment. We have to mourn the loss of never having a daughter/son. It’s real and its hard.
kristen says
Thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate your vulnerability. xoxo
Adel says
Can you share please
Michelle says
What did you end up having?
kristen says
A baby girl.